1 day

one day
is never enough.
twenty four 
hours
one thousand four hundred fourty
minutes
eighty six thousand four hundred
seconds
is never enough time
to say all that i want
to say
to breathe all the air
that i want to breathe
it is never enough time 
because those minutes
go by like they dont exist
those hours
pass my brain every two seconds
flashing the bright numbers
ten colon thirty
when i wake up on a saturday
two colon fourty
when i finally go to sleep
and those dreams
never hold anything
they are like clouds
so appealing
yet everything falls straight through
the next morning
not bothering to get out
of the clothes i slept in
i spend too much time
alone
in bed
staring at the ceiling
wondering
when all this madness will end
one day
it will be my birthday
but it will feel no different
than the day my uncle died
yes that is depressing to hear
im sorry that you have such
a small brain
but that is my point
one day
will be my demise
and i dont know
how one day
will be enough
to hold all that air
one day
it was thanksgiving
and i could not
hold back
the tears of
an anxiety attack
alone
while my "family"
laughed
and smiled
and really thought
family
meant
love
i guess
i shouldnt try
to keep these words in
ive only got
twenty four 
hours
one thousand four hundred fourty
minutes
eighty six thousand four hundred
seconds
to say them